The days ordained....

I celebrated my 41st birthday this week, and I’ve been pondering the aging process. I know, fun thoughts! Yes, 41 is half of 82, as John so lovingly reminds me. I woke up on my birthday thinking about;

Psalm139:13-16, “For You formed my inward parts; You wove me together in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Your works and my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; and in Your book were all written the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them.”

I also woke up thanking my mom for her fortitude...I was a late in life baby, my mom was 40 when she had me and my dad 48. Do the math, she's 81 and he's 88. In addition to celebrating my birthday this week, I also went to the doctor with my dad, where his rights to drive were permanently revoked. As I sat, listened and watched my dad be stripped of his “privilege”- the aging process took on a whole new look. My dad is a dying old man….and I am a dying middle-aged woman. Again, with the the fun thoughts, I know! All those days, even the day where my dad sat bewildered, yet with grace, hearing of another change of life phase…that day was written down in God’s book. I was struck by the fact that one day that will come for me too.

How will I handle that day and phase? Will God’s grace seem to be enough then and will I remember that even that day was ordained and known by Him? Will I still know and believe that I am fearfully and wonderfully made…even in that stage of life? I had the joy of learning this lesson from my dad. My dad’s outer man is decaying (as is mine!) but his inner man is being renewed day by day-2 Corinthians 4:16. Even in these decaying years my father is STILL fearfully and wonderfully made…made with a purpose and with days still ordained for him. God’s word says; our soul knows that very well. My dad’s soul knows that even in this time, God’s works for him and in him are wonderful. This aging process, this dying process is ugly, hard and sometimes unwanted BUT He is still in the midst of it. He still has His purposes in and through us in it. Praise His Name!